Demonic Circle > 3fps

February 18, 2009 at 4:47 pm 7 comments

I’ve been raiding attempting to raid on a laptop, since my boyfriend and raid leader is visiting from Calgary and I’ve ceded my desktop to him.  Call me crazy, but I think it’s more important that the main tank has a decent connection for Sarth 3D attempts than the largely expendable ‘lock.  If things get too bad, I can always replace myself … but I can’t really replace our one and only Feral Druid.  (As much as I’d like to.  Sometimes.  Such as when he /flails around for a drink in the middle of the night, knocks the plastic water bottle on the floor and doesn’t pick it up again.  Let this be a warning to all of you bears out there with an OCD warlock for a significant other:  PICKITUP!PICKITUP!PICKITUP!) 

Unfortunately, even connected directly to the router, with all graphical effects and spell details turned as low as they can go, I’m still averaging something like 3 fps in 25-man raids.

Not good.

Especially not good on a fight like Sartharion 3D.  If you haven’t attempted it yet, it’s kind of like the Illidari Council.  Backwards.  In heels.  (And I’ll give a free Healthstone to anyone who gets that reference.  /tango)

In other words: it’s yet another exercise in ekeing max DPS out of your DoT rotation while micromanaging your pet and Not Standing In The Bad®.

And believe me, there’s a LOT of Bad®. 

There are lava waves — HUGE walls of molten fire — that can come from either the north or the south side of a central platform.  If a wave comes from the north, then there are breaks here and here.  (I know you can’t see it, but I’m pointing at my screen.) 

On the other hand, if the wave comes from the south, then there are breaks there and there.   (Same thing; just run with it.  I gave up on making this an informative post and am simply ranting.  You should be used to it by now.)

At the same time, there are void zones (think Kel’Thuzad’s fissures, but blue) that appear in random places that will one-shot anyone unfortunate enough to be standing in them … and balls of fire that fall from the sky … and flocks of annoyingly cheerful, chirping, cawing, clawing baby dragons that are almost certain to be anchored in the most inconvenient place imaginable (thank you, Frost Nova!) … and packs of fire elementals, some enraged, others simply intent on frying your brain in a polite, non-enraged manner …

And did I mention the dragons?  Four of them, with fire breaths and a tail swipe.

Yes, it’s a little, tiny bit chaotic.

And if you happen to be keyboard turning for the first time in your life, on a laptop with a miniscule 15.4″ screen, and 3 fps that occasionally dips down to 3 spf …

Good luck.

Needlessly to say, I was having a really hard time dodging void zones and lava waves.  Not quite as hard of a time as Sean the Naked Orc Death Knight (who took 18) or our Prot Paladin (20), but I was clearly struggling, as our Warrior’s Failbot mod was all too happy to announce. 

*Elleiras fails at lava waves (1)
*Elleiras fails at lava waves (2)
*Elleiras fails at lava waves (5423)
*Elleiras fails at void zones (1)
*Elleiras fails at life. Why haven’t you /gkicked her already? Oh, she’s the GM? … wow, your guild must totally suck.


Eventually, it finally occurred to me: I’m a Warlock!  I have a Demonic Circle!  I should use it!

So I did … to amazing effect.  Really.  I went from not surviving a single attempt to outlasting the tanks, even with my god-awful fps and spikey lag.  I even managed to avoid the wipe once, kiting a couple of elementals to the portal and DPSing them down with the help of a friendly Boomkin while the rest of the raid zoned back into the instance.

Anyway, the trick was to ignore Sartharion in the first few seconds of the fight.  While the rest of the raid attempted to throw some DoTs or debuffs or combo points on him before Tenebron landed, I ran straight to one of the two “safe spots” (the hitherto mentioned here) and dropped a Demonic Circle.  Then I hightailed it to the other safe spot (there) and settled down to DPS.




Incinerate!  Incinerate!  Incinerate! 

When the lava wave came from the south (and I didn’t bother to look for it with my fps; I just listened for the announcement on Vent — or cheated, and watched on Keaton’s screen), I would simply hit my keybinding for Demonic Circle: Teleport and, *poof*, be in the right place.  Instantly.  Safe, sound, on the ground.  Then, as soon as the wave passed, I’d scoot back over into my original spot. 

If the lava wave came from the north, then I was already in the safe spot, and could just keep DPSing cheerfully away.

We’re heading back into OS25 tonight, so I’ll try to take some screen shots of our positioning and mark the safe spots.  I’m still surprised by the number of hits I get from people Googling “Sartharion + Drakes.”  Apparently, no one searches for “that one Warlock-turned-Shaman who still gets lost in old world instances and can’t jump unless she’s strung out on Swiftness Potions.”  Odd, that.

Goal for tonight: l2mendpet.  I specced Felguard/Emberstorm since it’s far more forgiving of lag than Affliction, but it’s been a while since I’ve had to micromanage Haaghun.  He keeps dying in the Bad®, but I think if I recall him to me for every lava wave he should be fine.  If not, our Prot Paladin (<3) offered to help me farm Solarian’s trinket.  If a Voidwalker can tank Sartharion, then the very least my Felguard can do is survive him long enough to do some DPS.


Entry filed under: WoW. Tags: , , , .

Northrend Roulette Nerf work.

7 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Karthis  |  February 18, 2009 at 5:14 pm

    Have I mentioned lately that I absolutely love your style? 😛

  • 2. Elleiras  |  February 18, 2009 at 5:24 pm

    Aw, thank you! Keep this up (and don’t knock any water bottles on the floor) and you may just become my favorite bear druid. 😉

  • 3. Benito  |  February 18, 2009 at 6:36 pm

    First things first; The Tango Maureen – Rent.

    Next up; I found your blog through WoW insider’s link to your post and I am absolutely hooked. I just love your writing style and your posts has actual meaning and content. I will be following along from now on. 🙂

  • 4. spinks  |  February 18, 2009 at 9:25 pm

    I say the quote is from Ginger Rogers, because it’s what I said when I was explaining to my feral tank friend how to tank Grobbulus (do what you normally do, but walk backwards round the room at the same time .. IN HEELS!!)

    Awesome post, I’m a fan 🙂

  • 5. Elleiras  |  February 18, 2009 at 10:37 pm

    It’s both, actually. Free healthstones for all! 😀

    I’ve had Rent on the brain all week because I subjected poor Keaton to it (several times, in fact) while he was down here … but I’m pretty sure Joanne in Rent is referring to the Ginger Rogers quote, too.

    Thanks for stopping by!

  • 6. Nibuca  |  February 18, 2009 at 11:10 pm

    Ok, no fair. I just did the screenshots last night for this post. I call hax! 😉


  • 7. Elleiras  |  February 18, 2009 at 11:33 pm

    I think your screen shots might be a *little* more helpful than my “You can’t see it, but I’m pointing over there…” 😉

    We didn’t have enough healers tonight for Sarth attempts, so I have no screen shots to share. I guess I’ll just have to look forward to your post. 😛


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