Delusional bear is … delusional.

March 16, 2009 at 6:38 pm 9 comments

my_bear

My boyfriend is not the most stable druid I have ever met.  As often as he teases me about drinking the “shaman water,” the truth is that he is the one who suffers from delusions.  Foremost among them is the idea (which he absolutely believes) that he is not a Hordeling at all, but rather a Night Elf druid who has somehow mastered the art of “Tauren form.” 

… and yet, for someone who is supposedly “infiltrating” the Horde (/air quotes) he has made no secret whatsoever of where his true allegiance lies.

He openly praises Elune.

He begins every new boss-fight with a heartfelt “For the Alliance!”

He steadfastly refuses to raise a paw against any Alliance adventurers he encounters out and about in the world, except in self defense (or, to his credit, my defense). 

He even /cheered when we wiped suffered a temporary setback in the Battle of Mount Hyjal, and were forced to watch Thrall fall in a blaze of Orcish glory after forgetting the Number #1 rule of raiding: don’t stand in The Bad®.  (Thrall tried to tank Azgalor in a Rain of Fire after our warrior died to an unfortunate silence.  Smart Warchief is … not so smart.  >.>)

I love my pet tank — in no small part because he doubles as a furry bear rug on those cold, Northrend nights. 

But there’s no denying it: he’s kind of crazy. 

So, really, it shouldn’t have come as a surprise to  me — when we decided to roll a pair of super-secret Alliance alts on a far-flung server — that he decided to play a Draenei shaman who … (wait for it) doesn’t believe he’s a Draenei shaman.

Oh, no.  “Kiirk” thinks he’s the captain of a spaceship.  He speaks in broken monologues.  And he can’t figure out exactly why this lavendar-skinned, purple-haired Vulcan is following him around with a perpetually concerned look on her face, occasionally transforming into a long-eared shelat to protect him from mobs aliens when he becomes too preoccupied with his totems crew to cast a lightning bolt arm a phaser in his own defense.

… It’s going to be an interesting 80 levels …

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Entry filed under: WoW. Tags: , .

Tremendously amused … I’m not ususally one to /pout about loot …

9 Comments Add your own

  • 1. BobTurkey  |  March 16, 2009 at 7:36 pm

    Great post. I laughed.

    Watch out when your BF insists on only wearing read chest armour…

    Reply
  • 2. Asara  |  March 17, 2009 at 4:23 am

    That’s hilarious. Seriously. XD

    It reminds me of my short-lived gnome rogue named Däta. He was going to be an engineer… Double O Negative!

    Reply
  • 3. Karthis  |  March 17, 2009 at 5:29 am

    Awesome =)

    Reply
  • 4. Melissa  |  March 17, 2009 at 6:51 am

    Now that is RP that I would probably enjoy!

    Reply
  • 5. miss elf  |  March 17, 2009 at 3:23 pm

    LOL!!!!

    Great post!!! 😀

    Reply
  • 6. Anea  |  March 17, 2009 at 4:14 pm

    That’s hilarious! It will CERTAINLY be an interesting 80 levels. Great post 🙂

    Reply
  • 7. Elleiras  |  March 17, 2009 at 4:21 pm

    And you haven’t even heard him raid lead in Kiirk’s voice after we return to our home server after an hour of questing on the lowbies …

    /facepalm

    Thanks for the comments! Glad you enjoyed his (ongoing) ’bout of insanity. 😉

    Reply
  • 8. BobTurkey  |  March 18, 2009 at 4:04 pm

    OMG does he do guest raid leading as Kiirk? I can prolly raise 500gp for him to come lead our 25s for a night!!

    Reply
  • 9. Aleathea  |  March 23, 2009 at 9:43 am

    That’s probably the cutest screenshot I’ve ever seen. Enjoy your writing also. Thanks for sharing!

    Reply

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